Bittersweet

Today was also bittersweet because I sent our youngest, our little girl, to kindergarten.  All week I have been working myself up over it and every time I thought about it, I started getting teary.  My dear husband decided to spend the day with me so I wasn’t home alone all day, possibly crying.  Once this morning got here, we were busy with the hustle and bustle of getting 3 kids ready for school.   We got breakfast eaten, mandatory photos taken and everyone out the door in plenty of time.  We walked our daughter to school because the boys have to go earlier than she does.  A couple times on the walk, I had some tears come out, but she was so excited, I couldn’t let her see my sadness.  I know this is such an important step for her, and she never looked back! There wasn’t one tear, not one hesitation, just maybe a lingering squeeze in my hand, and then off she went.  So, after a few more quick photos, we left.  I had a fun day hanging out with my hubby, which we NEVER get to do.  We ran errands, had a long lunch, and some ice cream. 

I am grateful for the routine that school brings to our home.  I am grateful that I will have ENTIRE days to myself.  I am grateful that during those days, I will answer to NO ONE ELSE.  Those 7 hours will be mine to do as I see fit.  That hasn’t happened in over 10 years.  I am looking forward to the possibilities those days hold.  Of course, I will still be subbing at the school.  I’m even doing a 6 week stint during a maternity leave.  But, over the course of the next 8 months, I can make myself a bit of a priority and that I am looking forward to.  For ten years, I couldn’t schedule anything without checking first what was going on with the kids, what my husband’s schedule was, what was going on at school, etc.  Now, for 7 hours, I get to make my own schedule (for the most part).  I’m almost giddy over the thoughts of watching movies, reading books, catching up on organizing photos, organizing closets, blogging, getting groceries and running errands by myself, baking, baking, and more baking, etc.  Of course, I will still have to cook and clean and pay bills, but once all that is done, the time is allllllll mine!  I plan to continue to volunteer my time by leading storytime once a month at our local library, help run an afterschool program at our church once a week, attend BSF (Bible Study Fellowship), and continue writing the newsletter for our local senior center.  So, it looks like I will have plenty to keep me busy until summer rolls around again! Stay tuned to see what I do with it!