A Mama’s Love for 14 Years

On this day, 14 years ago, I became a mother.  Our “baby” Patrick is 14.  He isn’t so much of a baby anymore, in fact he is taller than me.

Last week I babysat for a sweet 3 month old boy. His mama had to go back to work and their daycare wasn’t available yet, so I offered to help out on her first day back to work.

Oh, my heart broke for this mama who didn’t want to leave her sweet boy.  I remember not wanting to be separated from Patrick when he was born.  I took him everywhere and thankfully, I didn’t have to go back to work and leave him at daycare.  My husband and I decided that I would stay home with our children and I left my social work career to be a full-time mom.  I know that isn’t a choice for everyone, but it was our choice and I wouldn’t have had it any other way.

Babysitting this sweet boy last week reminded me of a sweet boy 14 years ago.  Oh how those days rushed back to me.  I took books along that we read to Patrick.  I sang the songs we sang to Patrick while feeding and rocking him.  I soothed his cries the same way I did 14 years ago.

It also reminded me of that feeling of being a first time mom.  I was nervous to take him to Target the first time.  I think I put everything we owned in the diaper bag.  I remember fretting about driving alone with him. I worried about how to handle it if he cried while I was getting groceries.

I checked to make sure he was still breathing if his nap went longer than normal. I worried if he didn’t poop every single day.  Since I struggled with breast feeding and not having enough milk for him, I also worried that he wasn’t getting the “proper” nutrition.

As a new mom, there are so many uncertainties, first experiences, and questions we don’t have all the answers to.  My dear new mama friend is struggling with many of those things.  I have offered advice and support, but have also listened to let her find her own way, just like I did.

Being a new mom is scary, I remember that feeling even though it was 14 years ago.  But, looking at this kid, I am guessing I did most everything right!  If you can’t tell from these photos of Patrick, he has quite the personality.  He is talented musically and very bright.  He is growing like a weed.  I seriously can’t believe he is taller than me! Anyway, as I look over these photos and relive the many memories with Patrick I guess I did something right.  Even though I was a scared mama 14 years ago, I figured it out.  I made mistakes, I learned from them and became a better mom for it.  Happy 14th Birthday Patrick!  I can’t wait to see what life has in store for you!

If you know a new mama, be sure to offer her a hug, a few hours off, or a chat.  I am sure she will appreciate the support and the chance to brag and show off her new baby!